Hi, I’m Heather F and I will be having my hot girl summer this year! As a mother of two, I reflect on my journey to 40 and am amazed at the growth.
Considering my eldest is 20 years old, he reminds me of my first milestone in life. At his age, I had been in a relationship for over three years when I got pregnant. We decided to get married, but it was short-lived and after a series of unfortunate events, I found myself a single mother. Though I did not receive support from my ex, I did receive support from a
village comprised of his family and my own. This foundation helped get me through those first years until I remarried, and we welcomed our daughter in 2008. My second husband was an old high school classmate. I initially met him when I was 14/15, that time in life when we were young and made repeated dumb mistakes. Mistakes can also teach lessons if you don’t allow yourself to get stuck in that pattern. Deciding to break the pattern, I decided to divorce my second husband in 2019, after years of dishonesty.
As a young mother, my identity was tied to the title “MOM”. I spent 100% of my time taking care of my son and then matched that energy with the birth of my daughter. I saw myself as a mother before I saw myself as a woman and for a while, I allowed myself to remain in that head space. I knew I needed to grow and change my view of myself and the choices I made in life (and in men) before I was ready to venture out. I hated the bars and the dating scene and found myself remembering the adage “Boys are Gross”. So, I gave myself a time-out.
I was 35 with equal kids to failed marriages, but rather than feel sorry for myself I opted to build my faith and dig into my relationship with Jesus. My faith, church community, and therapist were added to my village to create the salve my soul needed to get me back on my feet and ready to pursue other goals.
In 2019, I became an esthetician. For most of my life, I was bullied for being pale and I spent too much time trying to get my skin to produce melanin that just wasn’t there. As a result, I endured cancerous and pre-cancerous spots and other skin issues. Now, I get to combine my experience with my love of service and people (though they can be exhausting at times). I have a great career educating people of all ages on the importance of proper skincare and helping them reach their skin care goals with treatments.
Over the years, I began to see myself as more than just a mother and I wanted others to see that too. I am a loving, honest, loyal, patient (I try to be), funny, humble, playful, strong, and intelligent woman, who can be shy at times. With this realization, I stepped out of my comfort zone and onto a dating app. I found my boyfriend of over three years on Bumble after a few swipes and years of searching, but all good things come in their time. Andrew makes me feel sexy and pushes me to find new ways of exploring my empowerment and confidence. That is how I found Mirrored Images. After a few hours of wondering what my butt looked like and wondering what to do with my hands, I was one of the Glam Gang. A group of bold, courageous, feisty, and slightly mischievous women from all walks of life. I am proud to include myself among them.
I love being a woman and how I no longer must be defined in one way. I can be independent with a “can do it myself” attitude and come home and wrap myself in my man whenever I feel insecure. I can raise a young man to be God-fearing and a daughter that will reach for the stars. I can now love the person in the mirror and her micro-bladed eyebrows, tucked tummy, and fillers (thanks Jenn!). I am blessed beyond measure and am closer than ever to living my dreams. I may have rambled along the path to get here, but I am here. I proudly say SCREW THE HATERS. I have enough friends; I have a GANG.
Through Her Lens: April
March is Womens History Month... join us for our new series "Through her Lens," a blog series…